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Advanced Praise for “The Laughing Monk” book.
“This wonderful book is loaded with wit and wisdom to help you to enjoy a happier, more fulfilling life.”-Brian Tracy
What does globally recognized Achievement Expert Brian Tracy say about Dr.Caroline Manuel.
Journalist and CNN columnist, Vanessa Van-Petten interviewed Dr. Caroline Manuel as an expert trend-setter in improving mental health in the current economy.
The interview was featured on CNBC, Morningstar.com, CBS’Moneywatch.com,The Boston Globe,The Miami Herald, MarketWatch and Yahoo Finance.
Happiness Expert, Psychiatrist, Author and Speaker, Dr. Caroline Manuel Offers Empowerment to Those seeking to live their best lives despite stress.
Dr. Caroline Manuel has successfully created alternative methods to improving mental health while helping audiences all over the world manifest better quality lives.
She specializes in combining innovative neuroscience and medical research with forgotten happiness enhancers such as play, laughter, charity, yoga and gratitude to help teach people the art of happy living.
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Blog Posts:
The Laughing Kookaburra: How To Find Abundance In The New Year.
Unexpected Laughter: This Christmas we went away to Coffs-Harbour, a quiet coastal town between the hills and the sea on the east coast of Australia, quite a distance north of Sydney.
The sound of silence, the lush trees and a long stretch of deep blue sea greeted us upon our arrival. The son immediately wanted to leave. He complained: “It’s very quiet here, there’s only trees, I want to go back home.” He had expected a room full of play stations and computer games. The banana trees, a huge lake filled with lily pads, and a golf course were not his idea of a fun holiday
That evening a Kookaburra, a kingfisher bird native to Australia, perched itself on the tree in front of our balcony. It was quite large and plump, with short legs and a dark stripe of color through the eyes. Its wings were spotted gray-blue. All of a sudden it hopped fearlessly onto the balcony railing and then flew back into the tree. As if welcoming us, it began a loud cackling, laughing sound “Kokokakacucuhahahehe.” I immediately felt like laughing.
Even the son was momentarily amused and distracted from his despair about the lack of gadgets. The Kookaburra (Kooka) presented itself every day and everywhere we went. It was often joined by other Kookas, and they always laughed, a loud, echoing almost human laughter.
“The Kookaburras like us,” I said, at least I thought so, because every time we wandered on the nature trail on our way to the nearby restaurant, they flew conspicuously in our line of vision and perched themselves on a tree branch in front of us, followed by the “kokocacacaco” laugh. The same thing would happen when we returned to the resort. I began to watch for the comings and goings of the Kookaburras and listen to their laughter.
For some reason one Kooka took a liking to my son and followed him one day when he walked on the nature trail up to the store to get himself some snacks. It even posed nearby so he could get a close-up on videotape.
Coffs-Harbour welcomes its visitors not with the glitz or glamour of a city but with a small town simplicity, a relaxed ambience, and an abundance of nature and cheerful people. Our taxi driver offered the following with a smile: “I was a corporate man, a manager for a building company in Melbourne. I came here for work and never went back to the rat race.” I imagine the most livable climate in Australia, with unspoiled beaches, a backdrop of mountains, and a thriving banana industry, probably helped him make his decision.
“Perhaps we could live up here,” I suggested, much to the son’s horror, although he did express the desire to visit our laughing friends again.
Unexpected Kindness While we were away in Coffs-Harbour, a friend in Melbourne kindly fed our pet budgie birds and looked after our home. Our neighbor noticed our absence and collected mail for us even though we had forgotten to inform him of our holiday away. These simple acts of kindness warmed my heart.
So much abundance makes me grateful for the simple but beautiful things in life: our neighbors, family, friends, nature, Kookas and much more.
As we all move into 2012 here are some thoughts to add to our New Year’s resolutions:
Laugh a lot like the Kookaburras; laughter is a natural booster of our “happy” hormones.
Love: focus on love – it’s always there even during difficult times.
Kindness: give and you will receive. Research shows that doing good and helping others increases resilience and authentic happiness.
Gratitude: remember to focus on being grateful for our many blessings; beauty is everywhere in our life.
Click on this link to listen the laughter of the Kookas.
God Bless and may the doors of happiness, love and cheer be open to you in the New Year and beyond.
Dr. Caroline Manuel
© Dr. Caroline Manuel
Mindfulness in the Face of Distressing Negative Experiences.
“In times of holiday stress and adversity remember to pause and observe your thoughts and feelings like a Visitor viewing the passing clouds.
Laugh, ha..ha..ha..ha..ha, love and live.
Any conflict, the mad traffic, the demanding boss, family disputes, they are a dot in time, it is not all encompassing. It will pass.
Bring your focus from the negative to the positive, the seeds of worth and things you are grateful for.”- The Laughing Monk.
Challenging experiences like the hustle-bustle of holidays, divorce, physical illness, loss of a job, or frustrations at work with managers or co-workers can lead to negative emotions and thoughts. These can spiral into full-blown anxiety and depression and even physical illness like diabetes, asthma and heart disease.
Stress, pain, debilitating fear, depression and anxiety are more common than we think.
According to a recent World Health Organization (WHO) study, one in four people will be affected by depression, anxiety, or bipolar illness in their lifetime.
These conditions rank, along with cancer and heart disease, as a leading cause of poor quality of life and compromised daily functioning.
How can we not become this statistic?
Research and neuroscience inform us that:
□ Anxiety is the appraisal of a situation as threatening and is associated with many unpleasant sensations.
□ There are many well-researched and effective therapies and techniques to lift one out of anxiety or an emotional black hole. Sometimes medications can be helpful, however practicing mindfulness routinely with the techniques mentioned in the mindfulness work sheet (see http://www.thelaughingmonk.com/the-monks-resource-gift/) prepares the brain to stay fit to manage challenging life situations. These practices include mindful breathing, body scanning, walking and bathing.
□ Our brain is plastic and able to learn how to stay healthy and not succumb to stress. This is good news!
Jan and Dan – An Example
Christmas was approaching and Jan’s husband Dan was away on business. Jan was overwhelmed by holiday preparations, including their children’s activities and shopping for Christmas. She was overcome with panic, hot flashes, nausea, dizziness and a sense of doom. In addition to feeling totally alone, she was constantly worrying about these terrible sensations which only intensified them and made them more difficult to bear. When it came down to it, she felt horrible for feeling horrible.
Jan was introduced to mindfulness techniques which allowed her to begin observing her emotions or feelings and sensations like a visitor observing new scenery:
□ She scanned her body for sensations and noticed the unpleasant ones without judging them.
□ She checked her thought patterns which went something like “What If I fall sick, who will look after the kids?” She noticed her thoughts for what they were, rather than seeing them as reality.
□ Eventually she began to observe many other negative thought patterns and accepted them just as they were without her customary self-judgment. Jan’s anxiety subsided and she began to feel better after only a few months of persistent mindful practice.
Three keys to overcoming negative experiences with mindfulness.
1) Awareness: Becoming conscious of a distressing thought or emotion and accepting it without judgment. Using mindfulness techniques, disturbing thoughts, feelings and sensations can be observed as passing events in the mind at a particular moment in time rather than viewing them as reality and allowing negative experiences to become overwhelming.
2) Acceptance: A regular practice of training the mind to become adept at acceptance of both positive and negative thoughts and emotions.
3) Tolerance: Just as the ocean consists of both calm and stormy waters, we can experience emotions and thoughts that are pleasant or distressing. The key to help reduce the impact of negative thoughts is to notice them from the viewpoint of a non-judgmental observer.
The Laughing Monk’s Contest
The Monk is holding a contest whose winner will receive a $100 Amex or $100 Amazon.Com shopping voucher. Winner’s Choice.
To enter, simply post your comments on thelaughingmonk.com, home page, about how you are using and sharing mindfulness strategies.
a) How you are using mindfulness daily for yourself.
b) How you are sharing mindfulness with others.
We will read the entries and choose the winner based on the contestant’s frequency of Mindful Practice and service to others by sharing and helping them utilize this effective practice. The winner will be announced on February 15, 2012. The winner’s comment will be posted on The Laughing Monk Cafe.
Visit www.thelaughingmonk.com under The Monk’s Gift’s for worksheets on mindfulness.
Copyright Dr. Caroline Manuel. 2011
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How To Add More Sparkle To Your Relationship Without Saying A Word/ Mindful Presence.
Creating Mindful Presence.
“They sat together, Mia and Mike. She talked, and vented, for what seemed like a long time. He listened quietly, fully present for her, intently gazing into her eyes. She felt understood and listened to. No judgments or criticisms, no advice or suggestions from him, nor did he seem lost or far away. No distant glaze in his eyes. Mia gratefully thanked him for listening and he didn’t know what to say, for Mia was a housewife and Mike was her dog.”
Our pets, particularly dogs, give us their undivided attention, don’t they?
Best Practice Research
Best practice research and neuroscience show that conscious, attentive listening and focus on the person enables deeper neuronal connections and in turn more meaningful relationships.
People need to feel heard, listened to, and understood. Mindful Presence – or showing up in your body and soul for the person you are with – adds tremendous value to your relationship with them.
The Relationship from So-So to Magical
Dan finds it awfully difficult to tune in and listen when his wife goes on and on about her woes. Jan, his wife, suffers from Depression and Anxiety which leave her feeling frequently fatigued.
“Honey go take a walk, it will help you feel better,” suggests Dan helpfully. Jan begins to cry. Dan doesn’t understand why Jan is so upset now. He is out of his depth. “Take your medication, you will feel better,” he offers. Jan bursts out into a torrent of how Dan doesn’t care and understand what she is going through. He is even more confused.
Dan does not yet realize that all Jan needs in that moment is for him to consciously notice her, be present, listen intently without judgment or advice.
Dan learned how to practice Mindful Presence with Jan, which required only that he put aside his ego. Once he understood this, he committed to putting 30 minutes aside each day when he came home from work.
First, Dan greeted Jan mindfully. He looked straight into her eyes and listened to her ramblings about her day. His gaze upon her gaze, his ears hearing only her words, he offered no advice or suggestion, no criticisms or “Honey, it’s your fault. If only you would stop spending all that money …”
Jan couldn’t believe it. “Dan, what is going on?” she finally asked incredulously. “You listened to me without criticizing me or telling me what to do!”
“I just want to be present for you,” said Dan, delighted that five minutes of mindful being with Jan had saved them from a protracted battle, and the misery that always followed fighting.
Relationships are our most valuable asset. Yet it is those we love and know that we take for granted and spend less and less quality time with.
The Four Keys To Mindful Presence
First: Stop, Notice and remind yourself to become consciously aware of the person you are with.
Second: Look, Drop everything – phone calls, texting, watching TV – whatever you are doing and look at the person you are with.
Third: Let Be, Observe your thoughts and stop any judgments of yourself – or the other person. Create a neutral and safe space in which you allow yourself and the other to be accepted just as you are.
Fourth: Listen, For at least one minute or, ideally, longer, refrain from giving advice or suggestions. Take a deep breath in, breathe out, and then subtly focus on your breath. This conscious act allows you to focus on the other person and just listen.
It’s that simple – or hard. Hard to break the patterns of behavior we have been carrying for so long, but so simple once we do.
This blog is dedicated to all living creatures, particularly our pets. Let us not forget them that faithfully serve us and be ever mindful of their love.
The Laughing Monk wants you to succeed in living your best life. When we share and teach others we get more value from deeper integration of the effects of Mindfulness. So please share these neuroscience-based mindfulness tips with your friends and family.
The Laughing Monk’s Contest: The Monk is holding a contest whose winner will receive a $100 Amazon.Com shopping voucher.
To enter, simply post your comments on thelaughingmonk.com, home page, about how you are using and sharing mindfulness strategies.
a) How you are using mindfulness daily for yourself.
b) How you are sharing mindfulness with others.
We will read the entries and choose the winner based on the contestant’s frequency of Mindful Practice and service to others by sharing and helping them utilize this effective practice.
The winner will be announced on February 15, 2012. The winner’s comment will be posted on The Laughing Monk Cafe Blog.
Visit www.thelaughingmonk.com under The Monk’s Gift’s for worksheets on mindfulness. Copyright Dr. Caroline Manuel. 2011
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The Laughing Monk on Mindfulness/ Blog
“The yellow sunflowers swayed in the breeze that gently caressed her cheeks, the fragrance of jasmine, the rustling leaves danced over the ground beneath her feet.” -Dr. Caroline Manuel, The Laughing Monk
In that moment, all her thoughts were suspended in favor of her senses, for she was being mindful. Mindfulness-based stress reduction is a technique that encourages people to direct their attention to the sensations of simple things like breathing, smells, sounds, tastes, and touch.
Mindfulness is not only about the mind.
“More than just relaxation, mindfulness helps improve the self-image of people who suffer anxiety,” says Philippe Goldin, a psychology researcher at Stanford University. Social Anxiety is common and can affect 12 out of 100 people. Anxious people often are self-critical and frequently assume that others are thinking the worst of them. As Goldin says, mindfulness works because it teaches people how to focus on things other than personal self-criticism.
Mindfulness changes our levels of brain function.
Research by Goldin at Stanford University studied brain scans before and after participants engaged in a mindfulness practice; an MRI scan showed that mindfulness increased brain activity in areas that involved visual attention.
Anxiety sufferers often divert their gaze from those they perceive as being critical or threatening, which is often most people other than close friends and family. Mindfulness, by increasing visual attention, helps the anxious stay with the perceived threat rather than turning away from it, which results in deeper and meaningful relationships, and enhances quality of life.
Following is a simple mindfulness exercise that will enhance your brain’s performance and improve mental focus:
You can do this as soon as you wake up in the morning!
Ø Sit up straight on your bed. Alternatively, find a comfortable spot on the floor.
Ø Close your eyes.
Ø Close one nostril with your thumb breathe in slowly through the other. Count to 10 while doing so. Complete at-least ten cycles of breathing for each nostril.
Remember to focus on counting and the rhythm of your breathing, listen to the sounds created, and to feel the sensation of cold and warm air flowing in and out of your nose.
- You may find your mind wandering, but don’t let that trouble you. With practice your mind will wander less.
- You can do this as many times in the day as you like; best times are in the morning upon waking, and at night before going to bed.
- Practicing this exercise habitually and consistently, like brushing your teeth, is the secret to its success.
To help our blog reader friends, please share your own stories or questions about mindfulness in the comments section.
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The Sparkling Dew-Drops On The Grass- Mindfulness-2 Blog
“For many years, at great cost, I traveled through many countries, saw the high mountains, the oceans. The only things I did not see were the sparkling dewdrops in the grass just outside my door” -Rabindranath Tagore
Clutter and Chaos
The moment I woke up, my mind was cluttered with countless thoughts. I had a busy day ahead, cooking for about twenty friends. My thoughts raced. “Get the groceries. Pick up beverages. Don’t forget dessert. Drop son at music practice. Organize house. Set dining table. What if the food doesn’t turn out right?” And so on, like the chaos of traffic in rush hour.
How To Clear the Clutter
The mindfulness exercise I have habituated myself to – the one that works for me – got me wandering outside to mingle with nature. I invited my senses to focus in the moment, and the sight of a beautiful rose caught my eye. Its strong, heady fragrance drifted into my nostrils, and I bent down to touch its smooth petals. The bright pink color brightened my view – and yes, I saw the sparkling dewdrops, too.
Lingering amidst my own senses, I noticed a small tag hanging from the side of the pot. I realized that I had been on auto-pilot when I bought the rose plant and did not see the tag until now. It read:
Fiona’s Love Rose – “Fiona at the age of 14, was Australia’s youngest heart transplant patient. Her strength of courage and will-power saw her overcome amazing odds to become our nation’s longest surviving heart transplant patient. Fiona now devotes much of her time to being a goodwill ambassador for the Victor Chang Cardiac Research Institute.”
The tag was coupled with a personal note from Fiona, reminding me to make the most of life and enjoy every moment. Thanks for reminding us, Fiona, to bring back gratitude for small things big, for big things bigger.
I then found myself immersed in the moment. I became aware of the “peace”, “joey” and “Leonardo da vinci” roses surrounding me.
Mindfullness is such a simple exercise, and it’s benefits are supported by neuroscience. It is an effective technique to calming the restless mind, which in turn helps maximize the brain’s capacity.
By now all my worry thoughts had vanished because of my mindful focus on the roses and the heartwarming story about Fiona.
Simple & Quick Mindfulness Exercise
“Mindfulness is like brushing your teeth, it clears your mind of unnecessary clutter,” says psychiatrist and mindfulness expert, Dr. Daniel Siegel.
And like brushing your teeth, it does not take long to participate in a short but lasting mindfulness exercise. After inhaling and exhaling a few deep breaths, simply take a flower or plant and observe all the different colors of the flower petals or stems. Then, take a few moments to touch the sturdy stem, caress the supple petals. Lastly, sniff the life-affirming scent no matter the type of flower or plant. Inhale its earthy quality and be reminded that at that moment you are where you stand or sit, reinvigorating your senses.
Such a simple exercise, and so beneficial, as neuroscience shows it to be an effective technique in stilling the unquiet mind, which in turn helps maximize the brain’s capacity.
For a worksheet on mindfulness visit thelaughingmonk.com in ‘The Monk’s Gift’s’ section.
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Be A STAR In Your Life.
Hope this holiday season brings you lots of cheer and meaning!
As I sit with my web designer sister beside a San Diego beach, it is a cold wintery day, the skies draped with grey clouds. Stars behind the clouds shine brightly even though we can barely see them. Your mind, too, is a bright star even on the darkest of days.
A flock of tiny birds emerges from the sea spray onto the shore. Gliding as one, they stay together. It’s a timely metaphor for staying connected in this holiday season, with family, friends or the community.
Do you want to overcome obstacles by shining light in your life? Here are four steps based on proven research techniques, that together will make you a STAR.
1) Stay in the moment. Nature teaches great lessons in simple ways. Gather a small bunch of leaves or flowers to keep by your bedside. Twice a day, look at, smell, and touch each one as you breathe in to a count of ten, hold your breath to a count of four, and breathe out to a count of ten. Do this for about ten breaths. This will help you relax into exactly where you are.
2) Think different thoughts. Keep a journal next to your bedside and write ten things you are grateful for each day. Write all thoughts – positive and negative – that come to mind, then reframe the negative ones. Think of your negative thoughts as dark clouds that cover your positive inclinations, which like the star are radiant and uplifting. Shining light on your thinking and seeing negative thoughts from another angle helps create a different perspective.
3) Anticipate. Like the two mice learn in Who Moved My Cheese, change is like the wind. Simple planning is key to making things happen. Once a week, make a list of things you would like to do, such as meeting a friend, going for a walk, reading a book in the garden. I find that writing propels me to act. Each morning, I read what I’ve written to remind me what I’d planned to do. Of course, life happens and I don’t always get to do everything I’d like, still we often have a better quality of life from making a habit of writing, planning, and actually doing a few things on our list.
4) Radiate. Reach out to help another and reach out to ask for help. Like the star that radiates its light, a simple smile and greeting whomever you encounter can change your mood instantly. As we stepped out today we found many people smiling and saying hello, and I reached out to my sister, a web designer, to ask for help sorting out technical glitches on my website so I could send out these shining star holiday tips to you all.
Just like the STAR, you are luminous. Following these simple steps will help you shine brighter in your own life during the holidays, and well beyond.
Dr. Caroline M
© Dr. Caroline Manuel
